I Suck At Modern Dating Because I Don’t Like To Wait

Jayson Hinrichsen

To be candid, I am tired of the kind of practices prevalent in the modern day hookups - judging a man as a perfect man within five seconds, replying a message with the perfect response that makes you appear interested, among others. I feel the urge to give you reasons why the so-called social-media-kind-of-love sucks.

I'm not going to be secretive about my feelings.

I don't play mind games, and I hate looking disinterested. If I like or have feelings for you, the chances that I will honestly tell you are high. However, if you don't like me, don't expect me to chase you all around.

I will text a guy that I like back.

I am not going to wait to text a guy back just because I don't want him to have the notion that I think about him every moment of my life. Failing to text him or replying his messages late is tantamount to demeaning. I mean, it is another way of saying he's not as important.

I'm not going to invent myself to be something else.

I will reveal my true and energetic self to any guy right from the beginning of the relationship. If he likes me, fine! If he doesn't, at least, we will save each other's time from heading towards a futile relationship.

I am going to communicate.

Communication breakdown poses a severe threat to any relationship. I am not going to be that lady that only communicates through social media or via text alone, sending abstract emojis; I refuse to be an online-girlfriend or an online fan of my boyfriend.

I'm not going to be fussy.

It's good to get a wealthy guy with six packs, over six-feet in height, and all those perfect attributes which are most times, unrealistic. I only need to ensure I get a man who will compliment me as a person.

I'm not going to compare my relationship with someone else's.

It is worthy of note that no relationship is perfect even if I see many couples look perfect outside. I don't want to get disappointed.

I will not ignore people or leave them hanging with unanswered texts and obscure social media posts. Everyone deserves fair treatment. Relationships are not a challenge to complete. Once I'm in a relationship, I take things slowly. I don't want to rush myself such that I finally get myself into a mess. A wedding ring is not possible on the first date! I will instead take my time to study you so we can grow together. I wouldn't want to stay with you for months or years and eventually discover that I'm an afterthought. I will rather embarrass myself to get you than to let you slip away.

I'm going to listen more than I react. There are many underlying meanings in what guys say. I'd rather take my time to unveil those meanings than to respond at any slight provocation. I don't like people who put on any of the things above. That's why I'm quitting modern dating. Despite being a difficult decision, I'm ready to wear my heart on my sleeves.