7 Reminders That Every 23-Year-Old Needs To Hear Right Now

At 23, you are probably just out of college with the harsh reality of being a fully-fledged adult being so apparent.

In my case, this was a really challenging period, especially when it came to searching for a job. The experience was totally far from what I expected while still in school, mainly since I had pursued a lucrative degree, yet there was no job for me yet. Well, this is just one of the many challenges that most 23-year-olds face on a daily basis. Even with all this uncertainty, 23 is not a time to kill yourself with worries about life. To enjoy life better, you must always remember the following:

1. Feeling lost is normal.

Life is mostly a puzzle, and everyone feels lost and confused at times. At 23, you are still transitioning from a teenager to an adult, and it can be tough to find your grip in most situations. You may be at a job that you aren’t exactly passionate about or a relationship that doesn’t feel right, or you may be having frequent arguments with your parents. These periods when you have little clue about what is happening are the best moments to learn from your mistakes. Don’t get discouraged about trying out different things because you may be getting closer to the solution.

2. Learn to say O’.

Most of us have always been taught that saying O’ especially to authority figures is disrespectful. However, as an adult, you have to change this mindset. The world is full of people waiting to take advantage of your vulnerable self. For instance, if you feel that your skills and experience at a job are not compensated enough, then you may have to ask for a pay rise or quit. I remember when I was 23, I had to toil at an unpaid internship until I couldn’t handle it anymore. After digging into my savings, life became unbearable, and I decided to quit. Whether it is your family, boyfriend, employer or just that random guy you meet at the club, the power to say es’ or o’ lies in your hands. Don’t compromise your decisions if you feel they will cause you pain.

3. It is okay to fail.

Life has no rules or formulas, and since it doesn’t come with a manual, you must fail every now and again before mastering an art or skill. When a child is learning to crawl or walk, they will keep falling and crying, but they will always get up and try again and again. In the end, they become stronger to crawl and walk skillfully. What if the child decided that after falling, that would be the end of trying to crawl or walk? As young adults, we need to know that failing is very normal. At 23, you are still young, with all the time in the world to try out different ideas that strike you. Give yourself a chance to fail, learn, improve your skills and eventually succeed.

4. Stop comparing yourself to others.

In this era of social media and image filters, it is very easy to get intimidated by your peers’ successes as seen in their posts online. Success in life differs from one individual to another and just because your friend found a job immediately after college doesn’t mean that you are doomed if you find one after a year. The best solution to this is setting your own goals and working towards achieving them, instead of concentrating on what others are doing. You must start finding validation from within yourself, and not from others and you will live a happy and fruitful life.

5. Keep your circle small and tight.

As you grow up, you find that not everyone that claims to be your friend really is. In addition to that, you also discover that you have less time to please with everyone you ever interacted with. While keeping in touch is very important, you should be able to choose your best friends wisely. Whether it is family or friends, you must be able to identify your genuine friends and keep them close. These are the ones you will be able to comfortably turn to whenever you have a problem, need advice or even to celebrate your successes.

6.Love yourself and act like it.

Don’t wait for others to love you, start loving yourself no matter your insecurities. Whether you aren’t at your ideal weight yet or your face is full of acne, the first step to solving these is loving yourself unconditionally, embracing your weaknesses and trying to solve the ones that can be solved. Eat healthy, exercise, create real relationships away from the internet, laugh, love, live and have fun like you deserve. Treat yourself from time to time, even in the smallest way possible. After all, if you can’t start loving yourself, who else will?

7. Give yourself a break.

Life is not perfect, and everyone screws up so many times. Even if you failed to graduate from college as previously planned, don’t be too hard on yourself. Of course, you shouldn’t just relax and stay in your comfort zone; you have to keep working on your goals and dreams. If things don’t seem to work, stop, step back a little, analyze the situation and decide whether to try again or come up with a new action plan. In this busy life, taking breaks like a vacation from your regular routine will make it easier to deal with tough situations.

Having to depend on parents after an extended period of independence, the endless uncertainty of life and the constant worries about what to expect in life is a real struggle at this age. But the golden rule is to ensure that you love yourself and have fun responsibly. Life in your twenties moves really fast, and since it is the best time to party, enjoy your family, take strategic risks, fall and rise again, you better learn to embrace every moment as it comes.