Narcissists are all around us. You even admire some of them and look up to them. You will find them in many aspects of your life – when you sit in front of your TV, when picking up the newest bestseller, when you are enjoying your favorite sport, when you are casting your vote… the list goes on and on.
They are successful, and what they have achieved is truly inspirational. You might even feel indebted to them because you managed to get past a dark time in your life through their help. Yes, they helped you pick up the pieces when you were feeling down in the dumps.
When there was no longer any joy in your life, they helped ignite the spark that had you bounce back and take on life and all it could throw your way with renewed enthusiasm.
This person might be your sibling, your role model, your best friend, or even your lover.
But they have a darker side. They give you what you need but at a terrible cost. They can see through you and they can recognize the pain you are going through, and they will help you get up and move on from your suffering.
However, sooner or later, they will tear you down again; and your trust in them will make this easy and recurrent. Everything they do for you, whether it is to your benefit or not, is meant to advance their own selfish agendas.
They can tell you that you are incompetent, immoral, and unreliable, and then turn around and say you are the kindest, most considerate and most understanding person they know. And despite all the contradictions, you will eat up every word they say without question.
Lying is more than second nature to them - it is their very nature. To them, a lie is an absolute truth, and they have mastered the art of making their victims see them as such. That is the way it has to be, because, how else would you still stick around if you knew they were so full of lies?
But in believing a narcissist’s ceaseless lies, you get to the point of doubting your own sanity; and it’s because you have given them your confidence, trust, and put your hopes and dreams on them.
Even if you can see the evil in them, you will be the only one, because everyone else can see their wonderful nature. They also probably remember the person you are calling a narcissist standing by you during a dark period in your life. So, as far as the world is concerned, it’s you that’s crazy.
And you will feel guilty for expressing this truth to the world; the narcissist will make sure of it. They will make you see how you are "ruining" their reputation, how you make them lose control of themselves, and how they are the victims and you are the bad guy.
But it’s not just you who is suffering, they are too. Their world is an illusion, a house of cards. That is why they need victims like yourself so desperately in order to keep their sad little lie-based worlds from crumbling all around them and exposing their deep insecurities and vulnerabilities.
They do not even clearly understand themselves, but they know they have to use lies to keep their illusions alive. They admire you, and that’s because they understand they are different in ways they themselves don’t even like.
They can’t take that you can do without them. That scares them because they need victims to feel alive and fill the deep voids within them. That is why they will always use lies and manipulations to keep you dependent on them.
And now that you know all this, and can see through the veil into the illusions, why allow them to lie to you and manipulate you any longer?