Love is a mysterious thing, and you may find yourself loving a person you can’t have. Our hearts sometimes look for love in forbidden places. You may madly fall in love with your best friend’s fiance, your boss’s wife, or a close friend who is seeing someone else. Whether you try to hide your emotions, you can never escape the pain of knowing you will never have them. The following tips will help you cope with the pain of loving someone you can’t have.
1. Spend time together, but don't cross the boundaries.
It’s tempting to ask for a romantic relationship when you are around someone that you love, but can’t have. Don’t do it because it can’t happen, and you will only experience more pain. Try to enjoy the time you spend together as friends because it’s better that way, over cutting off the person completely.
2. Be a true friend, but guard your emotions.
You can be “Doctor Phil” to your “forbidden love” and provide a crying shoulder when they need it. However, you watch out not to give too much because it will cause you emotional pain. In case the person is asking you to do more than you should, be open about it and decline.
3. Nurture your hobbies to avoid thinking about the person too much.
Taking part in activities you enjoy will help divert your attention from the person of your desire. You will notice that the more you immerse yourself in your hobbies, the less you think about the person.
4. Avoid situations that are likely to hurt you.
For instance, if you know that your “forbidden love” will be attending a party in the company of their partner, don’t show up. This will save you from the pain of seeing someone you love with somebody else.
5. Spend time with friends.
Hanging around people who care about you will go a long way in helping you deal with the heartache that comes with wanting someone you can’t have. Spending time with your buddies also gives you the chance to share your experience with them. They will provide you with the support you need because they too have been caught in a similar situation.
6. Minimize contact.
Seeing someone you love makes you happy and elicits a warm feeling. However, you should limit contact with the person you can’t have because it only gives you temporary happiness. It’s better to accept reality and start healing your wounds, than hope for something that will never happen. If you refuse to let go, you will have to endure pain for months or years.
7. Date other people.
Dating other people is a piece of advice you wouldn’t want to hear when you are in love with someone that can’t love you back. You will have to be brave and make the move, but keep in mind that you should never try to look for your “forbidden love” in another person. Enjoy the company of the person you are seeing.
8. Exclude them from your social media feeds.
Most people in love with someone they can’t have would like to know what they are doing. Social media provides the best opportunity for keeping up with a crush you can’t have. However, seeing them embrace their lover is not the image you would like to see. So stay away.