I Have A Good Life - Why Am I Still Unhappy?

One of the most important things you should know about unhappiness is that it's very easy. It's happiness that requires work, which is one of the reasons why a lot of people are unhappy. They believe that happiness is something that is easy to find, and they can get it in a few easy steps. The truth, however, is a lot messier, and here are a few reasons why people often end up unhappy.

Conflation

What does that mean? Conflation basically means confusing two different things as being similar. When you conflate happiness with sex, money, fame or even sensations then you will always end up unhappy, because you are confusing something you want with something that you don't really understand. The trouble with many of our desires is that we can't look at them objectively. In most cases, we just take for granted that what we want will inevitably make us happy, but this isn't really the case. Don't fall into this trap. Sometimes, happiness can come from things that you may have ignored all your life.

Thinking happiness all boils down to one thing

Another source of unhappiness is the belief that happiness comes from one thing. This is why a lot of people become unhappy. If only they could become rich. If alone they could live in this city. If only they could get this career. Although there's nothing wrong with having goals, pinning one's happiness on just one thing will not lead to such an outcome, and when this happens, people become unhappy because they are disappointed that their goals have not given them what they want. So don't let one or two things define your happiness otherwise, you'll only end up with the opposite.

Relying on others

Other people can be a source of both joy and unhappiness. So if you rely too much on a single person to make you happy then you're setting yourself up for disappointment. Even if this particular person is the kindest, wisest and most cheerful person you know, you have to keep in mind that they are still human, and have flaws of their own. You may not even be aware of these imperfections, but they can shatter your feelings for the person you love, which is why you shouldn't entirely rely on other people to make your life content. This isn't to say that you shouldn't have friends or family. Social relationships play an important role in individual happiness. The critical point here is that you should be able to move on when a relationship starts to fall apart. A lot of people are miserable because they can't move on from a bad relationship.

Indulging your emotions

Finally, it's worth mentioning indulging your emotions is one of the easiest ways to become happy. It sounds strange, because we think happiness is an emotion, and it is, but it is also more than that. Happiness and unhappiness are also states of being. For example, it's easy to be content if your life is in order and you have no debt even if everything around you seems a little annoying. Likewise, if your life is a mess then it doesn't matter how much you party, sooner or later, you will end up miserable.