Everyone needs a home, and a home is made of family. Most people feel obligated to stick with family as a sense of responsibility and ethical standards. We don't get to choose family if blood is the bonding factor, but that is perfectly Ok if blood relations are a real family. However, the moment you can't feel at home or be yourself with a blood relation, you need to rethink the bond. Toxic behavior from a family member can cause extreme health deterioration at both mental and physical levels.
These are the characters of family members you should cut off for your own good:
1. Fair Weather family members
You don't get to choose blood family members, but the same standards we hold others to have to apply to them too. A family member who comes to you when they need something and disappears the rest of the time is not family. They will come to you for help and stick to the sidelines if you are troubled. This is risky behavior that makes you feel abandoned and lonely during hard times.
2. They are perennial critics
The best family member is one that corrects you when you do something wrong. When you are with your family, you should be safe to do the most stupid and crazy stuff you love, without fear of criticism. If you have a family member that seems agitated or triggered by everything you do, You should put them off. They leave you stressed and constantly trying to please them is too taxing.
3. They bring a negative influence
Family inspires the biggest constructive ideas. The greatest artists, business people, and innovators attribute positive family impact to their success. You should stay close to that family member that brings out the best in you, for your health and success. Once you notice a family member who influences you to drift away from your dream, it is time to cut them off.
4. They blame you for their failures
This is a very common cause of the guilt feeling. You are only responsible for your own success and not any member of your family. Family members that remind you of how you are the cause of their lost opportunities will stress you for no reason.
5. They Thrive on your pain
This is very common. You find these family members who are OK as long as long as you are in trouble. They cause your sadness inflicting mental and physical pain without remorse. They cause stress and economic problems for your family, and you should put them off.
6. They are a burden
This may sound unethical to some people, but some burdensome family members just have to go. It is Ok to help your family, but this should never happen at the expense of your own well-being. You will never develop if you do not have time and resources to take care of your own needs. A family member who ties you up with every problem they have may limit your personal development and happiness.
Cutting off a family member is not easy. Getting a feeling of loneliness and guilt is common. However, the family is an all-time companion, and every toxic member close to you increases the harm. Here is what to do if you feel bad about cutting off a family member:
1. Replace them with a better companion
The distance and lack of communication can cause loneliness, making the results of cutting them off worse than those of holding on to them. You should get a person, an activity or a pet that produces the best in you. This becomes your new family. Friends are always the best replacement to go to after detaching from a toxic family member to retain the human touch.
2. Give yourself time to heal
The impact of a harmful family member around you can last long after putting them off. The more time that goes by after they exit your life, the more opportunities you have to make new connections. After some time, you will definitely feel comfortable and less sympathetic for deciding to cut off your family member.
3. Get help
If the effects are not bearable, you can seek professional help. Medical support can be a great way to relax and get the best solutions to your personal safety needs. These needs are the main things denied by the family members you have to cut off.
No matter how close the family member is, you should never make yourself a second priority in your own safety. You need to make sure your basic safety needs are met with any family member around. Tolerating lousy behavior and unfair treatment from a family member may cause irreversible damage. Putting off the family member is good for your safety and their safety as well. You can actually create a stronger family by cutting off some people.