She feels like she is just one of the people’s many options, and yet she just sticks around and waits to get picked. She knows she is better than being people’s backup plan, and she doesn’t deserve to be the second choice. And yet here she is, being treated that way. She cares so much about everyone around her, to the point where she has a hard time telling them she is hurt by their actions.
Honestly, she’d rather allow her own feelings to get hurt than to hurt someone else’s.
But what she needs to realize is that people can see it. She lives her life not giving herself credit, or treating herself like a top priority, so no one else does. Not everyone lives by the golden rule… treat others how you want to be treated. Some people you meet are only takers.
Once she begins to respect herself, other people will respect her too. Except she is so caught up in her head, jumping to conclusions… and they’re never good ones. She can’t stop overthinking every single thing that happens in her day, no matter how hard she tries.
She loves with her entire heart but her heart is extremely stubborn. She would do anything for those she cared about and ask for nothing in return.
It’s exhausting though trying to be the better person for everyone. It takes a toll. What she needs is to take a deep breath. No matter what it was that made her become like this, it’s okay. A relationship, her parents, a toxic friendship, it could even have been a mix of the three.
But what she needs to remind herself is that in any form of relationship both parties should be equal.
She deserves to be treated like she is important because she is important. And she is so much more amazing than she thinks she is.
She has a beautiful soul which makes her an inspiring person so she needs to put herself first.
There’s a simple phrase out there from the wonderful Dr. Suess that goes a little something like this…
“Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
So here’s that daily reminder that you are not an option, you are amazing! So don’t let people treat you like one.
But it’s very important not to put the focus on the fact that the teenager is upset. Instead, let them feel or know that they have a right to be upset, as that is the only way to get to a point where a solution to the problem would be welcome or even useful.
Overreacting will only make the crisis worse. So, when your teenage child is having a breakdown, it is not time to issue threats or ultimatums. Trying to offer solutions, however well-intended, will not help either.
Your child is not broken, he/she is slowly recreating who they are so that they can finally mature.
So, when you see a teen in a crisis, the first thing you should do is calm them down. Everything else comes later.