Many times dating is just a constant string of disappointments and embarrassments. We spend so much time trying to find the perfect guy to spend life with, and we often end up feeling like our efforts have gone to waste. If you're unfortunate enough to have dating problems then it's important that you take a break.
Yes, there's a chance that you're going to miss out on someone nice, but if you can't get your life or your emotions together then it won't matter. You'll keep making the same mistakes as long as you're in a bad head space. So if you're having relationship issues as well as too many bad dates then here are a few things that you should tell yourself:
Let's be honest, we all know that relationships can be exhausting. There are mind games that you have to play as well as weird problems that you have to tolerate. Whenever your special someone begins to manifest too much BS, then it's time to cut your losses and just move on.
Dating the wrong type of people happens all the time, but when you do it over and over again, it becomes tiring. So if you're weary of the BS, it's time to take some rest. Over time, you'll be able to build up your tolerance for that sort of thing, and you can go back to the dating market, ready to take some hits, until you find the right one.
Every date is a significant emotional investment. You say to yourself, 'This is the guy' or 'I feel lucky about this one' only to discover later that he's barely different from all the other guys you've dated.
This sort of disappointment can be emotionally taxing, especially when you get several bad dates in a row. When this happens, you should put your love life on hold even for a little while. You will also need to have something positive in your life otherwise you could end up angry, resentful and irritated all the time. Once you've gotten over all the stresses of your previous dates, you can go back to the dating market.
Failed dates can be a serious source of sadness and frustration, both of which can spread to the rest of your life and even your work. When this happens, it's important to do something that makes you happy.
Take a vacation, go shopping, relax with friends or do things that you enjoy doing. Your happiness does not depend on who you date, and it's important to remind yourself of that truth after you've gone through a string of bad dates.
When you date enough people, it becomes a system, a cold mechanical system that is designed to help you find "the one." Well, maybe this system has the opposite effect. Perhaps it's the cause of all your dating problems.
If so, then it's time to fix it. Look at your dating history and then figure out what you're doing wrong. Maybe it's the type of guys you keep meeting, or it could even be the topics of your conversations. In any case, you will need to do something about these problems before you can start dating again.
Being put on the spot makes it harder for us to define our boundaries. In our attempts to appease the person giving us their attention, we agree to things without meaning to.
But failure to have boundaries lets other people force us into situations that make us resent them. As long as you think having boundaries makes you rude, the wrong people will continue to put demands on you and you will end up resenting them.
You also need to stop equating having boundaries with lack of compassion. Instead, see it as a way to have self-respect. After all, you wouldn’t go around imposing responsibilities on people if it would make them uncomfortable.
Before anyone can respect you, you have to respect yourself first.
So, don’t be in a rush to give a response the next time someone asks you for a favor. Take your time and think it over and then give an answer you will not regret.
It’s okay to be honest about what’s not okay and what is.